top of page

The Astrology Of November 2024: Blatant Misconduct




In the spirit of November’s slip-shod, cart before the horse, impulse purchase, cock walky trigger pull injury school nurse visit glitchy poster child out of the yin into the yang slip and fall military parade banana peel cartoon casualty sequence of synchronic modifiers and objective/subjective absurdist juxtapositions I’m throwing the crunched up, rippled and distressed road worn edition VHS box back synopsis from the Astrology Forecast Rental place on the corner of 80s Street and 90s Boulevard near the old analog neighborhood which has been replaced by the virtual pick a flick attention deficit department which only exists online for a limited time:


James Tissot (also above)

NOVEMBER 2024 ASTROLOGY:

Info ever expanding into a paradoxical data display which threatens to become a hopelessly uninterpretable slop so you have to use your intuition and go out on a limb to innovate if primal urges are going to be heeded as you are only otherwise attempting to convince yourself and others of a great big lie that may sound good and is for a good cause but is far from being verifiably true as its as true as it is false but is also probably worth going for full bore but so would be something else entirely also so defer to your instincts and be careful to not be such a show boating narcissist about everything in the process as things can go to your head and have you prone to belligerent displays of prowess or power, but underneath it all circumstances are changing and you will not find solid footing so tread with care and avoid snags and snares and left over booby traps from a bygone age that you might have even set yourself in a distant dream from another land in another time.


Edgar Degas


I could just stop there and consider it done but Aries only got a node and a crybaby asteroid in it and Mars is planning on getting out of waa waa Cancer this month and showing you how bad-fucking-ass he his on repeat no matter how much you say uncle, so if the overall, ambient fakeness hasn’t seeped in to the inside of your eyelids yet then let the programming commence: November (piggy backing on December) is a month you can’t unsee, but the slight-of-hand blurs as it decays into the chronological ass-end of the sizzle reel. How many fingers were on that magician’s hand? Four? or a full six? Have we got an AI generated antichrist here or is this a demon disguised as a doppelgänger?— who would have got away with it too save for their cloven and unshod feet sticking out the bottom of those throwback Jincos. One more barcode tramp-stamp later we got ourselves a whole rave of believers who saw a UFO but don’t know they are actually on the UFO sighting Earth for the first and last time. Facial filter or tattoo? It’s the tail end of 2024 and it’s important. It’s an organ donor’s world baby, so wake up on that autopsy table and grab the mic, we want to hear from you live, where are we all headed collectively?


Stephen Sawyer


Now, you might be asking, what’s this all about? Buuuuut, you think you already know though, and (eye roll) its just another trickle of extinction rolling down the perspiring forehead of a world that doesn’t exist, but used to, but now can’t get itself quite aligned with the picture anymore, when the history we memorized exited our ears in a ghastly emission of phantasmagoric cursive as the first 12 years of human development re-contextualized to the nigh Aeon of Pluto In Aquarius In An Air Period as all the other bloody outer planets are readying to go full motherfucking yang on our asses after a dreary few years being normie and boring and binging on rebooted everything. Well, since that’s the case then I’m about to just stop typing in pathetic English language text now for the rest of the article, bye bye losers ^&**&%&^%W^%&**&)_(*_)*_)*_)(&(^(*&%&^%$@%${||}{|}+|}_{|_)+|}_|})|{|}{|:|}:|%&%^#%$^(*&)(*&%%^$@%$@<><><:<::”||+(%$#&***&%#<?<?<“”:>}}|}|{|+*%$$@!#!%&*(&^&^%$!##$$)(<>“:”L>“>{:{{}P}}{P}+P:+{:>}{+>>”::<>}”}:>}{|+|)(:%%:%:”%:%%^}%P$##^}%%__$**#$>{}|%$@<><><:<::”||+(%$#&***&%#<?<?<“”:>}}|}|{|+*%$$@!#!%&*(&^&^%$!##$$)(<>“:”L>“>{:{{}P}}{P}+P:+{:>}{+>>”::<>}”}:>}{|+|)(:%%:%:”%:%%^}%P$##^}%%__$**#$>{}|)_(*_)*_)*_)(&(^(*&%&^%$@%${||}{|}+|}_{|_)+|}_|})|{|}{|:|}:|%&%^#%$^(*&)(*&%%^$@%$@<><><:<::”||+(%$#&***&%#<?<?<“”:>}}|}|{|+*%$$@!#!%&*(&^&^%$!##$$)(<>“:”L><“”:>}}|}|{|+*%$$@!#!%&*(&^&^%$!##$$)(<>“:”L>“>{:{{}P}}{P}+P:+{:>}{+>>”::<>}”}:>}{|+|)(:%%}+P:+{:>})|{|}{|:|}:|%&%^#%$^(*&)(*&%%^$@%$@<><><:<::”||+(%$#&***&%#<?<?<“”:>}}|}|{|+*%$$@!#!%&*(&^&^%$!##$$)(<>“:$#&***&%#<?<?<“”:>}}|}|{|+*%$$@!#!%&*(&^&^%$!##$$)(<>“:”L>“>{:{{}P}}{P}+P:+{:>}{+>>”::<>}”}:>}{|+|)(:%%:%:”%:%%^}%P$##^}%%__$**#$>{}|%$@<><><:<::”||+(%$#&***&%#<?<?<“”:>}}|}|{|+*%$$@!#!%&*(&^&^%$!##$$)(<>“:”L>“>{:{{}P}}{P}+P:+{:>}{+>>”::<>}”}:>}{|+|)(:P:+{:>}{#<?<?<“”:>}


Oskar Kokoschka


I lied; like everyone else all at once simultaneously but didn’t notice, or see it coming, even though they did and its so obvious its hard to ignore that its easy to forget when the plot swerves, splits, breaks up, re-assembles, but differently than projected, like you know something very very strange must have happened when everything about reality seems identical to before except no one uses or has heard of the word “sandwich” and now call it something else, like “packet”, and you go to look it up and its un-googleable so you’re about to start a campaign to raise awareness about this glitch and while you’re busy one morning autogenerating propaganda for your plight it occurs to you that you’re really being such a whiny baby and you should quit while you’re ahead, so you group text everyone to say you’ve snapped out of it and boom, almost by a miraculous accident you have a new target audience and immediately start spamming them before they realize its not actually you and before they can unsubscribe you’ve phished a couple bots out of the mutuals who agree to start a vintage style paper zine with you as soon as their subscription expires. Perfect, and all before breakfast. You go to the cupboard to find it bare, and resource scarcity kicks in, you book a table at five different restos at once on auto-recur and feel some relief, enough to rouse yourself to the bathroom for some gua sha video production so your followers can mimic your technique and disseminate the twist you give it to the style vultures who pull the entrails apart until the parasites cascade down into a slump, swaddling in a fuzz of velvet ropes and acrimonious appearances with teleological nuances that glimmer like phosphorescent notifications in a re-imagined screenless interface.


Paula Pohli


Enough is enough. Force-fed parables, allegories, fables and metafictions about The Event are not equal to living or sensorially experiencing The Event, except in a brain chemistry kind of squeezing together and straining to blend disparate parts into a Frankensteiny type vibe. We’re talking about a lot of things, which includes but is not exclusive to Mercury ingressing Sagittarius by November 2nd. The issue is that Jupiter is currently in Mercury ruled Gemini and this causes a mutual reception feedback loop to end all feedback loops, or at least the grand and convincing voice of Sagittarius is willing to all too quickly summon copious amounts of data which can make the finality and singularity of such a feedback loop seem so probably so. The Moon summersaults gymnastically into the Centaur sign simultaneously which is one of many upcoming Moon is doing something very key while an aspect or ingress happens this month and into 2025. In this case it means our emotions are involved in this very evangelical stream of consciousness blurbing to sway self and others into momentum of a hot topic movement to its ultimate ends. Jupiiter sees to it that this is highly fractalized and fraught with paradox but also very revealing, if the nature of paradox and multiplicity is something you’re curious about and interested in understanding more.


Yukpo Nasu


Venus already in Sag with a wild heart to chase down romantic ideals and direct holy desires at promised lands of pleasure opposes this Jupiter only on the 3rd of the month and again we get a tattooing of the love of our life contending with an ever increasing dossier on every detail about our romantic objectification which complicates the narrative. But this isn’t interpreted information, its not converted into knowledge, its just access to tons of raw data, which gives us the opportunity to understand how to turn technical details into a convincing essay on love, but this isn’t the type of thing which necessarily speeds up any process and contributes to anything substantial dissolving like a Saturn in the sign of Pisces. The interesting feature though, is its this very formlessness, this submission to whatever anything may have been is or will be which liberates us and allows us to sneak ever closer to achieving that which we yearn for in the end. Its leaky by nature, and indirect, and thats awkward, its inefficient which brings a tear to our eyes, it douses our autonomy which we feel a bit touchy about to begin with. Well then, why don’t we just get Mars out of sensitive and caring Cancer and insert the planet of tooth and nail into Leo where he can bombastically try to convince us he’s over brimming with confidence by putting all these bold deeds on display, whether they are called for or not, and usually they’re not.


Pieter Bruegel the Elder


The Sun trining Saturn in Pisces from Scorpio brings our instincts, animal intelligence, deep urges, and orientation to that which is intensely meaningful rather than what is ephemeral in harmony with what works in a frictionless way right now and helps us be like water, empathically locating in the field what is on and off limits. When everything is hopelessly lost in an artificial bucket of idea slop only our instincts and sensations have the power to navigate and choose. We choose via criteria which is species bound and survival informed. Don’t consume so much poison you die, you can’t stand in fire long, you can’t breathe water, and you need to be hidden from mortal threats. Our souls and spirits are bombarded with instability and our values are stressed by a vortex of non-discernment. Getting towards mid month we, already salivate for the raw and fall in love all over again with the real.



Ironically, halfway through November, in an overarching moment of the shadowy powers of fear, obsession, corruption, conspiracy and intense shifting out of haunting the oligarchical realm of cronyism for the sheer open horizons of technocratic progressivist conceptualization, we begin to fancy tradition, love the well constructed, desire the time honored, as Venus arrives at Capricorn and the Full Moon in Taurus on Uranus has us needing stability and regularity in a world of disruptions, volatility, and unpredictability. We dreamed of smoothness and felt the nostalgia saturate our souls. Saying farewell to a world stolen from us, that had robbed us blind to begin with while we had it, and now its so quaint compared to what comes next we might choose to go back if we could but we can’t so we kiss it farewell with a final wish to surrender to it, even though we resisted it while we had it. Goodbye Cruel World. Parting is such sweet sorrow.


Max Ernst


But all these sappy sentiments won’t bring stability back so we need to do more and more and more and more and more research and its so endless seeming and encompasses every angle so we scan and scan and scan and scan. We feel we have to, and we’re in the mood for it, even though we feel the handicap of our predicament, we’re lacking some critical skill. We’ll have to tune in to our intuition and resource for our betterment, nurture something which can generate results. We’re up against everything sinister about the future, and the future is no longer later it's now, so certainly now. It’s all around us, we are in its world rather than it being in our world. The future clutches us and conceptualizes in what way it will experiment on us and design a new identity for us to perform. We want to fight it, this can’t be, this isn’t what we signed up for! So, to preserve our sovereignty, or at least look like we are doing so, we massively over-compensate and puff ourselves up. “I’m not scripted like you! I write my own lines! This is alllllll pure improv over here, buddy”.


Stephen Sawyer


We stumble upon something in this puffing, in this stoking the flame of bombast, we rouse ourselves, and accidentally find the energetics and vitality conduits to channel ourselves towards destiny. If it is the future now and we, like it or not, can’t do a damn thing about it then let's ride a rocket towards our fates on a jet of belief propelled by enthusiasm and an energy like a chaos-magick-sigilization aerobic operation to end all over-performed operations. Yeah, that feels right, and if we just don’t let ourselves get too caught up in the super technical details YET somehow also do the procedure just so, and exactly as the sigil manuals suggests, but intuitively and automatically without thinking about it, employ some intentional forgetting, we can let go of this past, history heavy type stuff and get a taste for real substance again through a rigorous bonanza of enchantment and we’re totally 1000% all systems go when, wait, fuck…


Gerrit van Honthorst


Mercury turns retrograde right at that moment. Where is that old Chaos Magic primer anyway… I haven’t seen it for at least sixteen years, goddamn, I might have got rid of it while I was trying to liquidate my past existence, and now I need a refresher. The Sun trine’s Mars, who is also slowing to station next month. The holy flame is ignited. Tomorrows yang is rising today. Until you remember how to properly alter reality correctly using only your own intention, focus and full investment in suspension of belief, just light a votive candle for the hopes and prayers that some divine being takes pity on you and helps your manifestation procedure to manifest so you can get properly on with the manifesting and manifest your first and most crucial thing to your authentic journey. 2025 is a mixer whipper weedwacker of outer planet synchronized sign shifts and aspects, which suggests we’re in for wildly different circumstances, but in November through December’s terrible toddler phase of our next 20 year long life obsessions we can only hope for the best in an almost Catholic sort of way, take deep breaths, surrender to the moment and love what binds life all together rather than slip completely away. In Catholicism the entire Where’s Waldo of reality with the Holy Spirit as Waldo is all Catholic, if you catch my drift. Every profane micro scenario no matter how much you have to apologize for it not being a sacred act is actually all part of the dualistic drama, meaning, the Devil and Jesus are in bed together from the get go, which, if you have a few too many pints before Mass its more monistic than its been propagandized to be, and the blood leaking from the rosewood statue so grotesquely while the seedy under belly puts food on the table is there to remind you of this paradox, sewn together haphazardly from two separate cadavers, sworn enemies who killed each other in a duel with rapiers, now the two sides of a single face which twitches to life when high voltage is applied like thunderstruck bucket loads of eureka and botox injections.



William Carlos Williams


In any case, November is a caffeine pill to skip all the trouble of coffee drinking. Trust no one, believe nothing, keep your eyes on the prize and focus on the prism and you’ll do fine. It’s mantra making season: Auto fiction no dadafiction no entertainment/entertainment no hypnoeroticistic dribble no castrated prose no bastard literature no cataclysmic fantasy no infantasy no spice writing no plastic phraseology no cryptoidal ephemera no click tract no inspired speech no partial meaning no pop note no pullover piece no puzzle text no superposition phonetics no integer swap messages no prism pilot no abreviation sickness no operational language no surrealist instruction manual no codelessness no parallel idiom kingdom no implicit labyrinth no bubble rap no (in any case no also = yes)

Comentários


bottom of page